Results
1. Russell - 265 (4pts)
2. Chris - 241 (3pts)
3. Claire - 233 (2pts)
4. Kerrie - 135 (1pt)
Summary
It was Saturday, so, naturally we descended upon Claire's (my sister's) house. This is not unusual, of course, but this time we were invited down for a celebratory barbecue as it was her birthday the next day (A very happy birthday by the way xxxx). We, of course, graciously accepted her invitation and I think I can confidently say that a good time was had by all. There was good (well, not horrible) company, there was food ("cooked" by Claire's "beloved" Neil) and even better, there was Yahtzee. We played a little later than usual due to the festivities, and BECAUSE of the festivities, there was a bit more alcohol consumed beforehand than usual, but we got it done.
In the interest of full disclosure, we did play the League match first, but at the time of writing we are still waiting on the absentees to submit their scores. So, the Champion's League summary will have to come first!
Rusty Bushty Bibbly Wibbly, or just Russell if you're normal, took the top spot this week. He was probably the most in control of most of the competitors, except for Kerrie as she doesn't drink, but we'll get to her. Russell was cool calm and collected, a bit like when he was a chess grand master back in the 1920's. He would destroy all oncomers. He would just swat them aside and exhibit absolutely zero emotion while doing it. His only downfall was cough syrup. He developed a serious habit in 1925 and it seriously derailed his career. He couldn't get enough of the stuff and he ended up in rehab multiple times and relapsed about as often. In his defence though, he never once had a tickly cough throughout the whole of his ordeal. He remains second in the table but he's put himself at a great advantage.
I came second in the match. I have to admit to being a little bit worse for wear by the time the match began. My aforementioned daddy (Russell) had brought me a litre of good old Yorkshire scrumpy cider from his holiday in Cornwall, and I enjoyed every last drop of it too. Perhaps I enjoyed it a little too quickly and I was somewhat impaired. But I would never use that as an excuse, no no no! Nope, I just didn't play well enough, end of. Because of this my Pappy is a mere one point behind me in the table. Yes, I remain first, but for how long, I do not know. My bum hole is starting to twitch.
Claire crawled and dribbled her way into third in the match. She too had had her fair share of booze before the match, but she brushes her teeth with rum so it was hardly a detriment to her. She played pretty well, not falling too far behind me, but if I'm honest, I think she might have been a bit distracted. You see, she seemed to be keeping her drooping, beady eyes on her husband, Neil, to make sure he was paying full attentions to his barbecue duties. Funny thing is that he wasn't and she still didn't say anything, so perhaps she should have given her full attentions to her game, because we all ended up with shits the next day anyway! She remains third in the table.
Finally, Kerrie came last in the match. Now, as I have stated, 99.9% of our faction love a good drink, but not Kerrie, she has other vices. For weeks and weeks I thought she was solely shopping for holidays, trips to the theatre and expensive accoutrements. But, now I think she's up to something. I have been racking my brains about what it could be. Then it struck me. Since Kerrie has been a teeny tiny whippersnapper, she has loved all things cheesy pop music; Steps, Aqua, Vengaboys etc. But the truth is, these once famed popstars have fallen on hard times due to the fact that no bugger listens to them anymore. So, like many a poor soul, they turned to the only true source of guaranteed income left on this planet: OnlyFans. Now, I am by no means assuming the type of content that Kerrie watches on this Satan endorsed website, but by all accounts she has racked up quite a bill. In fact, when my dad and kerrie turned up that evening, they were not driving their usual Suzuki 4x4, they were in fact on a tandem bicycle. It'll be okay though... probably... she remains fourth in the table.
League Table as of 02/08/25
1. Chris - 21pts
2. Russell - 20pts
3. Claire - 16pts
4. Kerrie - 12pts
Comments
Post a Comment