BHOF0001 - League #3 - Match 07/15 - 05/07/25 - Match Summary

 

Results
1. Claire - 483 (11pts)
2. Russell - 331 (10pts)
3. Lee - 316 (9pts)
4. Chloe - 306 (8pts)
5. Neil - 272 (7pts)
6. Kerrie - 247 (6pts)
7. Chris - 241 (5pts)
8. Grace - 225 (4pts)
9. Faith - 189 (3pts)
10. Millie - 157 (2pts)
11. Jacob - 124 (1pt)

Summary
  Once in a while, a League match comes along to really shake things up and shock the complacency out of their mid-tournament slumber. Indeed, this was one such match.
  Claire took top spot in the match with a whopping score. She's gone right back to basics with her Yahtzee strategy and alcohol consumption. She has since returned to drinking Carlsberg for breakfast, the cornflakes were doing nothing for her. Claire moves all the way from fifth in the League up to second. Well done, Sir. Russell came second in the match with another impressive performance. Dat boy got skills! The gribbler is 100% in the mix for potential champion of this year's League. It wouldn't be his first serious Championship win. In the 1800's he was an illegal boxer known as Rusty "Butcher" Bush. He fought for 312 rounds against Jimmy "The Piglet" to become the undisputed Champion of Cornwall. A prestigious honour. He moves from fourth in the League up to second. Lee took a brief vacation from the doldrums of god awful results to come third in the match. Could this be the beginning of something special? I hope so, after months of silence I'm actually beginning to miss his overconfident mouth. He moves from joint ninth in the League up to eighth. Chloe came fourth in the match with a great outing. She must definitely still be in contact with her Turkish swingers as she performed even better than last week. They must be organising their next meeting. Probably over here. I hope they like Yahtzee. She moves from seventh in the League up to sixth. Neil came fifth in the match. What the hell has happened?! I know the bible said the meek shall inherit the Earth, but I didn't think it meant over the Yahtzee board! This bloody match got flipped totally on it's flipping head! He moves from eleventh in the League up to tenth. Kerrie came sixth in the match. Which is definitely unusual, given her tyrannical ways. She can take command of the Yahtzee board with great authority, like a Winston Churchill, Abraham Lincoln or Adolf Hitler. She moves from joint second in the League down to third. I came seventh, with a score that on a normal day might have got me somewhere, but this was not a normal day, or a normal match. On this day I was nothing but an overgrown yeti that was all fingers and thumbs. I thought the problem might have been that I was sexually frustrated. This is well known to affect performances. Then I realised I've been with Faith for twenty five years so I've been sexually frustrated for at least twenty four! I move from joint second in the League down to joint fourth. Bloody marvellous! Grace came eighth in the match. She was an honourary Yorkshire lass for the weekend as she had come home from Wales to visit Heidi (my youngest, her sister) for her birthday. So, naturally I was excited for her to play a bit of "in person" Yahtzee instead of all that online nonsense. That didn't happen though, as she decided to swan off drinking with her mates. Charming. She played Faith online at a later date. She moves from eighth in the League down to ninth. Faith came ninth in the match. She hasn't actually been doing too bad over the course of this League, so I guess this could count as a wee blip. It would be fair to say that Yahtzee isn't the highest on her list of priorities. First on the list is definitely giving me earache (which I deserve... most of the time), second is sewing, which she does a remarkable job at and third is definitely giving me earache. She falls from sixth in the League down to seventh. Millie came tenth in the match. There must be something extremely comforting all the way down at the bottom of the matches and Leagues as she seems to spend an awful lot of time down there. Come on Millie, it's a lot nicer up here! She falls from joint ninth in the League down to eleventh. And then we come to last place, bottom of the barrel. And who would we find down there? None other than Jacob. Forgive me, I don't wish to come across as pompous but I am stifling a giggle as I'm writing this. It was a truly unbecoming score for a man that has shown up seemingly out of nowhere and made quite the name for himself, with an ego to match. He'll regroup, I'm sure, but a good dose of humility is never a bad thing. He moves from first place down to joint fourth with little old me.

League Table as of 05/07/25
1. Russell - 52pts
2. Claire - 51pts
3. Kerrie - 50pts
=4. Chris - 49pts
=4.Jacob - 49pts
6. Chloe - 43pts
7. Faith - 39pts
8. Lee - 36pts
9. Grace - 35pts
10. Neil - 32pts
11. Millie - 29pts

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