Results
1. Russell - 518 (9pts)
2. Neil - 361 (8pts)
3. Chris - 309 (7pts)
4. Molly - 269 (6pts)
5. Lee - 215 (5pts)
6. Kerrie - 214 (4pts)
7. Millie - 189 (3pts)
8. Faith - 174 (2pts)
9. Claire - 158 (1pt)
Summary
It's coming down to it now. We're down to the nitty gritty, squeaky bum time. This was the penultimate match of the League. You know what that means don't you, next week (if all goes well) is the final. Someone (er, I wonder who) will be crowned the second League Champion of The BHO. But, we had a match to play before we get to the final. And score wise, it was a bit of a belter!
The seasoned codger, Russell, absolutely blistered his way into the Match's top spot with a whopping score! With three Yahtzees to call his own, the old man was on top form. He rolled them dice with precision, like a lone gunman popping off innocent bystanders at the top of a bell tower, somewhere in the US. This did actually happen to him in a past life. He defended an entire town from enemy insurgents in France during WWII, killing 397 enemies single handedly. Pity he was fighting for the Germans. He improved his League position from fourth, to joint second. Good man. Neil came second in the Match with a very good score. In the spirit of full disclosure, this was a split match, so I was unable to keep my beady eyes on him, so he might have cheated, because he is that kind of guy. The kind of guy that would lend you a fiver, tell you to forget about it, then remind you about it for six months after every time you're going to the bar. BUT, there were many there to be my eyes, so I doubt he got up to any shady shenanigans on this particular evening. He retains joint second in the League along with Russell. So, the fight for second place proper is going right down to the wire. Come on lads, we need to get it sorted! I came third in the match with a score, which, on any other day would have got me at least second place, if not first. But it was not to be. But that silly old gribbler, andthat other silly old gribbler had to do really well didn't they? Story of my bloody Yahtzee career really. Not that I'm bitter or anything. I, rather irritatingly, remain seventh in the League... not that I even care. Molly, yes Molly... honest, finished fourth in the match with a respectable score, and for her, some might say a bloody miraculous score. She's had a few good scores of late, but just like your dear narrator, it's come a little too late in the day for it to make any real difference. But good on her for sticking with it when others might have given up. She may have hoggarth for a surname but she's a Bush at heart. That steely, squidgy, nicotine ruined heart. She does, however, remain stapled to the floor of the League. Lee, or Lee Lee, or The Forehead, or The Tattooed Gobshite, or The God of Self Love (he came up with that one) came in fifth in the Match with an average score. He's had a pretty OK season. He's frequently been in the top three, never really got worried about the prospect of sinking to the depths of the League. Nope, you've gotta hand it to him, when it comes to consistency, the man's got it. It's just a pity he can't just give it that extra push and knock out something truly spectacular (not my words, Millie mentioned something to me weeks ago. I assume she was talking about Yahtzee). Lee falls from joint second to fourth in the League. Kerrie had a bit of a wobble this week with a pretty average score. One of a few in recent times. One could make the claim that now she's pretty much won, she's just coasting along. But that would be poor sportsmanship and Kerrie is not that kind of person (or is she?). No, I'm joking, she's very sporting. Fortunately for Kerrie, she seems to have gone off the boil at exactly the most fortuitous time possible. One of the many, MANY things that have gone this fortunate gits way over the course of this season. She remains first in the League... still. Millie finished seventh in the match. I wasn't there to see her play, but I can imagine it was more of the same; head buried in the phone, waiting for her turn to come around. She tends to get distracted bless her, primarily by TikTok. I wish someone would help me. What is the fascination with that sodding app. I don't know, maybe I'll become a convert... but i doubt it. Millie remains fifth in the League. Which is pretty decent for her to be honest. Faith, while once again battling against the sandman, finished eighth in the match. I can't help feeling she is letting her potential slip by. But it's not exactly her fault, she's a busy woman and she's always got something going on, bless her. But then again, get a bloody cup of coffee would you? She remains sixth in the League. Finishing in ninth, or, bottom of the barrel, point, laugh and demean the unlucky fool position, was Claire. She has capitulated in recent times, although she did have a brief redemption in the End of Year Knockout, and yes, she has been in hospital, but, if truth be told, she has been a bit shit. BUT, until next week at least, she is still the only BHO member to possess not one, but two Championship badges. So, you can't exactly be too harsh with my old, bingo winged sibling. She remains eighth in the League. So, it all comes down to the next Match. Alas, it is merely a formality as far as the Champion is concerned. Sorry to spoil it all for you, but if you're any good at maths, even if you aren't to be perfectly honest, it's a bit bloody obvious. So, congratulations to Kerrie (full and proper congrats in the next summary). However, it seems we have a fight for second place. And my dad, Russell, did mention that he would give his left testicle to beat Neil, so let's se how that pans out shall we? Who knows, it might even get physical. Perhaps I'll get to make a summary on the BHO's inaugural geriatric boxing match!
League Table as of 01/02/25
1. Kerrie - 93
2. Neil - 81
2. Russell - 81
4. Lee - 78
5. Millie - 73
6. Faith - 69
7. Chris - 66
8. Claire - 51
9. Molly - 44
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